“SHE WON’T FORGET THE DAYS ALONE” — Relative Describes Pain Waiting for Missing Children 🕯️

A torn piece of map was found under the tent, suggesting Tom Phillips planned a move every 21 days. The mother’s sleepless nights now make sense: she may have guessed the next hideout without knowing.

“She Won’t Forget the Days Alone” — A Relative’s Account of a Mother’s Anguish and a Fugitive’s Elusive Plan

The nearly four-year ordeal of New Zealand’s missing children—Jayda, Maverick, and Ember Phillips—came to a tragic end on September 8, 2025, when their fugitive father, Tom Phillips, was shot dead by police in Piopio, Waikato, following an attempted burglary. The children, who had been living in the wilderness with their father since December 2021, were found alive at a remote campsite, bringing relief to a nation that had followed their story with bated breath. Now, a relative of the children’s mother, known as Cat, has opened up about the unbearable pain of waiting during those long years of uncertainty. A chilling discovery at the campsite—a torn piece of map suggesting Phillips planned to relocate every 21 days—sheds new light on why Cat’s sleepless nights were haunted by a mother’s intuition that she might have known their next hideout without realizing it.

The Long Wait in the Shadows

For Cat, the mother of Jayda (12), Maverick (10), and Ember (9), the disappearance of her children after a custody dispute with Tom Phillips was a living nightmare. Phillips, a skilled bushman facing charges of aggravated robbery, aggravated wounding, and unlawful possession of firearms, fled with the children into the dense Waikato wilderness in December 2021. What followed was a relentless search by police, volunteers, and the Marokopa community, with no trace of the family for months at a time. Rare sightings, such as a 2022 glimpse of Phillips and the children near Marokopa and August 2025 CCTV footage of an alleged store break-in, kept hope alive but deepened Cat’s despair.

A close relative, who requested anonymity to protect the family’s privacy, spoke to Stuff about the toll on Cat. “She won’t forget the days alone,” the relative said. “Every night, she’d lie awake, hearing their voices, imagining where they might be. She’d stare at maps, trying to guess where Tom might have taken them. It was like she was chasing ghosts.” Cat’s intuition, fueled by her intimate knowledge of Phillips’ survivalist tendencies, led her to suspect he was moving frequently to evade capture. Yet, without concrete evidence, her theories remained agonizing hypotheticals.

The relative described Cat’s emotional state as a mix of hope and torment. “She’d say, ‘I know they’re out there, I can feel it,’ but not knowing if they were safe, if they were cold or hungry, tore her apart.” Cat’s fears were compounded by Ember’s asthma, which required medication, and the knowledge that Phillips was involving the children in criminal activities, such as the store break-in captured on CCTV. The relative added, “Cat felt powerless, but she never gave up. She’d drive around Marokopa, talk to locals, anything to feel closer to her babies.”

A Fatal Encounter and a Campsite Discovery

The saga reached its tragic conclusion on September 8, 2025, when police responded to a burglary at a Piopio farm supply store. Officers pursued two individuals on a quad bike, suspected to be Phillips and one of his children. After laying road spikes to stop the vehicle, police were met with gunfire from a high-powered rifle. One officer was critically injured, and a second officer returned fire, fatally wounding Phillips. One child was taken into custody at the scene and provided information that led police to a remote campsite 2 kilometers away, where the other two children were found later that day, around 4:30 p.m., in near-freezing conditions.

The children, described as cooperative and “doing well under the circumstances,” were taken for medical checks and placed in the care of Oranga Tamariki, New Zealand’s child welfare agency. At the campsite, police uncovered a trove of survival gear: 21 bottles, four gas stoves, quad bikes, tires, cans of soft drinks, firearms, and ammunition. Among these items was a torn piece of map, marked with dates and locations, suggesting Phillips had a methodical plan to relocate every 21 days to avoid detection.

This discovery stunned investigators and provided a possible explanation for Cat’s sleepless nights. The relative explained, “Cat always said Tom was too clever to stay in one place too long. She’d mark up maps herself, trying to predict his next move based on his old hunting spots or places he knew from childhood. She’d say, ‘He’s got a pattern, I just can’t see it.’ That map proves she was closer to the truth than anyone realized.” The torn map, found under the tent, indicated a cycle of movement that aligned with Cat’s instincts, suggesting she may have unknowingly been on the verge of pinpointing their location.

A Mother’s Intuition and a Family’s Resilience

The map’s discovery has added a layer of poignancy to Cat’s ordeal. While the exact details of the map’s markings remain undisclosed pending the police investigation, its existence suggests Phillips maintained a disciplined strategy to stay one step ahead of authorities. The 21-day cycle may have been designed to exploit the rugged terrain of Waikato, where dense bushland and remote trails provided cover. For Cat, the realization that her children were constantly on the move deepens the tragedy of their lost years. “She’d talk about how the kids must be scared, always moving, never settled,” the relative said. “It breaks her heart to think they lived like that.”

Cat’s statement to Radio New Zealand (RNZ) reflected her relief and sorrow: “We are deeply relieved that for our tamariki this ordeal has come to an end. They have been dearly missed every day for nearly four years. At the same time, we are saddened by how events unfolded. Our hope was always for a peaceful resolution.” The relative elaborated, “Cat’s biggest fear was that the kids would get caught in the crossfire. She’s grateful they’re safe, but she’s grieving the life they’ve lost and the way it all ended.”

The children’s resilience has been a point of focus for the family. The child present during the burglary cooperated with police, helping locate the campsite and their siblings. “Those kids are strong,” the relative said. “They’ve been through hell, but they’re fighters. Cat’s determined to give them the love and stability they’ve missed.” The discovery of a crayon-written note at the campsite, mentioned in earlier reports, further hints at the children’s emotional state, possibly an attempt to reach out to their mother during their isolation.

A Community’s Grief and Lingering Questions

The Marokopa community remains divided over Tom Phillips’ actions. Some locals viewed him as a survivalist hero, while others, including Cat, condemned his decision to take the children into hiding. “It was selfish,” the relative said. “Cat called it child abuse, and she’s right. Those kids deserved school, friends, a home—not a life on the run.” Waitomo District Mayor John Robertson expressed the community’s sorrow, calling the outcome “heartbreaking for everyone involved.”

Police continue to investigate how Phillips sustained his family for nearly four years. The presence of firearms, stolen goods, and survival equipment suggests possible outside help, a theory supported by locals who doubt Phillips could have survived solely on bushcraft. The torn map provides a critical clue, indicating a level of planning that may have involved pre-selected hideouts. Forensic analysis of the campsite, expected to take several days, may reveal more about Phillips’ network and resources.

A Path to Healing

For Cat, the reunion with her children marks the beginning of a long journey. “She won’t forget the days alone,” the relative said, “but now she’s focused on the days ahead with her kids.” The torn map, like the crayon note, serves as a haunting reminder of the years stolen from Jayda, Maverick, and Ember. Cat’s intuition, which kept her searching even in her darkest moments, may have brought her closer to her children than anyone knew. As the family begins to heal, the relative emphasized Cat’s resolve: “She’s their rock. She’ll make sure they know they’re loved and safe now.”

The investigation into Phillips’ activities and the children’s experiences continues, but for now, Cat and her children are taking the first steps toward recovery. The torn map, a symbol of Phillips’ elusive plan, also underscores a mother’s unbreakable bond with her children—one that endured through years of uncertainty and sleepless nights.